Sassy Captions for Instagram

The Ultimate List of Sassy Captions for Instagram, for when you need a Smart, Tongue-in-cheek Comeback

Did you know that Instagram captions are more difficult to coin than clicking the picture-perfect photo? According to Instagram’s new algorithm, your posts could get lost if it has poor engagement rates.

And, the best way to improve engagement rates – you need sassy, tongue-in-cheek captions that will make your followers pour in their Instagram likes and Instagram comments.

And, who knows with the right captions, your posts may end up in the holy grail of Instagram – the coveted Explore page.

Here, in this post, we help you win over your Instagram followers with witty and funny, sassy quotes.


We give you a complete list of the perfect sassy Instagram captions to go along with your picture perfect posts.

The Perfect Sassy Instagram Captions to Stand Out & Make People Notice You

  1. I hope you step on a pile of Legos.
  2. If karma doesn’t give you what you deserve, I certainly will.
  3. My life feels like a test, for which I skipped studying.
  4. I don’t want to spoil my winged eyeliner, crying over you.
  5. I may be kind, but that doesn’t mean I’m weak.
  6. Revenge? Nah, I’m too lazy for that shit. I’m gonna just here and watch from the front seat when karma hits you.
  7. I love the sound you make when you shut up.
  8. If people are complaining about what you eat, just go ahead and eat them too.
  9. 50% Sassy. 50% Sweetheart. What comes out depends on you.
  10. Sometimes, you’re both the beauty and the beast.
  11. I’m like a bucket of sunshine, but be careful there’s a storm brewing in it.
  12. Too glam to give a damn.
  13. No issues, if you don’t like me. Not everyone is blessed with good taste.
  14. I liked your hair better when it was its natural color. Cool, I liked you better, when you weren’t talking.
  15. Sometimes the grass is green on the other side of the fence, coz it’s fake.
  16. Be proud of your extra pounds. Studies state that fat people are harder to kidnap.
  17. A real woman – has Curves, Muscles, Is skinny – Whatever the hell she wants to be.
  18. Your face is where your nose belongs. Don’t stick it in my life.
  19. I know looks aren’t everything. But, I have them, just in case.
  20. You were my cup of tea a long time ago. But, now I’ve moved to champagne.
  21. I don’t want to get diabetes and think, “I wish I could have eaten that when I still could have.” #cupcakesforlife
  22. I love sarcasm. It’s just like punching people in the face, not with your fists, but with words.
  23. They say perfection takes time. This is why I’m always running late.
  24. I’m not always savage. Sometimes, I’m sleeping.
  25. Did you know that the condom factory sent your parents an apology letter when you were born?
  26. If you’re wondering why I’m so quiet around you, it’s because it’s not possible to plan a murder aloud.
  27. I understand that you don’t like me, but do you know that I don’t care.
  28. Your closest friend may be your biggest hater. Don’t go by what people tell you, see beneath their masks.
  29. I may be 5’2”. But, my attitude is 6’2”. #shortgirlsrule
  30. Kill them with your smile and a killer body.
  31. Ordinary girls are made of sugar, spice, and everything nice. But, me I’m made of sarcasm, wine and everything fine.
  32. What’s your superpower? Mine is giving sarcastic comebacks, without people realizing that they’re being insulted.
  33. I don’t hate you. It’s either I love you or I don’t care at all.
  34. You bring out my inner serial killer.
  35. Don’t break people’s hearts. They just have one. Instead, break their bones. They have 206.
  36. You make me want to stab myself with a fork.
  37. You look 100% better when I can’t see you.
  38. Dear Karma, I’ve got a list of people you have missed.
  39. I love everybody. Some I love to hug, whereas others I love to punch in the face.
  40. If ever I put my head down, it’s just for admiring my stilettos.
  41. There are no bad pictures. That’s how your face looks.
  42. An apple a day keeps everyone away. If you throw it hard enough.
  43. I hope Karma slaps you hard before I do.
  44. Some people are like clouds. The day gets better when they are gone.
  45. Ewww….People.
  46. Normal is boring.
  47. Be savage and not average.
  48. Stay classy, sassy and a bit bad assy.
  49. Move over people; my sassy mode is in full form today.
  50. There’s tons of difference between being lonely and being alone.


Sassy Quotes when you’re Single and Loving every minute of it

  1. Look carefully; there is no “u” in “my life.”
  2. I’m single like a dollar, but I ain’t looking for any change.
  3. I love the sound my feet make when I’m walking away from things that I don’t like.
  4. The day when a man makes me happy than pizza delivery is the day when I change my single status.
  5. Don’t be a princess waiting for her Prince Charming. Instead, be a queen busy with her kingdom, until her king arrives.
  6. I’m not looking for my better half, coz I’m whole.
  7. I’m still single, coz I don’t want anything but amazing.
  8. The only thing I’m committed to right now is my dog.
  9. Yes, I’m single, but are you amazing to change that?
  10. Single by Choice.


Famous Sassy Quotes by Celebrities

  1. “A girl doesn’t need anyone who doesn’t need her.” – Marilyn Monroe
  2. “Listen, Smile and Agree. Then, go ahead and do whatever the fuck you were gonna do anyway.” – Robert Downey Jr
  3. “Pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick and pull yourself together.” – Liz Taylor
  4. “You don’t deserve my tears. Guess, that’s why there aren’t any.” – Beyonce
  5. “Life is too short, to bullshit.” – Naomi Campbell
  6. “If you follow all the rules, you miss all the fun.” – Katherine Hepburn
  7. “A woman is like a tea bag. You don’t know how strong she is until she is dropped in hot water.” – Eleanor Roosevelt.
  8. “I’d rather die my way than live yours.” – Lauren Oliver
  9. “A lot of people are afraid to ask for what they want. That’s why they don’t get what they want.” – Madonna
  10. “Bitches, get stuff done.” – Tina Fey

Go ahead and spread your Sassiness like confetti!

Click here to get Free Instagram Likes Instantly from Instant Subscribers

Recent Articles

Related Stories